Empathy

Written by Tony Aloise

Empathy is the ability to understand, feel and share the feelings of another.  It is temporarily stepping into their situation and trying to think, feel and experience what another is feeling.  It is related to but not the same as sympathy which is feelings of pity and sorrow for someone else's misfortune.

Empathy can be learned.  It starts with becoming mindful but is built on a curiosity to consider an alternate viewpoint.  You listen and become available without needing to solve a problem.  You suspend judgement.  Comfort is offered.  It can be a spiritual experience.  Empathy is an essential life skill.

As a parent, you may wonder “what is the crying baby feeling?” or “why is my teen moody?”  It’s important as a mentor and as a manager too.  It is an important skill in any role and a wonderful way to build closer relationships.  Empathy is easier if you have a similar experience.  I know what it’s like to lose a parent but not a child.  I know what it’s like to be a dad but not a mom.  That doesn’t mean I can’t try to better understand.

Empathy is one of those life skills that can change the world.  Imagine stepping into the shoes of a struggling teen, someone in a wheelchair, or someone from the other political party.  Our judging mind tends to exclude others who are not like us.  What if we shifted our mindset to one of understanding?

This blog was inspired by the book “Empathy: Why It Matters, and How to Get It” by Roman Krznaric.